Gratitude in Grief {When Giving Thanks Brings Joy}

Is it possible to have gratitude in grief?

I watch them enter with grace and take their seat in the front row: the son and daughter and husband who miss her so. The granddaughter and grandson. The sister and great-grandchildren, and all the family and friends–all of them here to remember.

I see the flowers that line the front, their beauty given to ease the ache. But it will be her beauty and the remembering that will bring the joy.

I hear them speak and remember. And while there are tears, there’s also laughter in remembering the fun times together. Each one recounts all the years and the memories as treasured gifts. And as I listen to their words, I hear them giving thanks.

The husband gives thanks for her love.

The daughter gives thanks for her friendship.

The granddaughter gives thanks for her example.

The grandson gives thanks for her support.

Great-grandchildren give thanks for her in song–singing of peace, love, and joy, like a river.

And friends, and family, and coworkers give thanks for her character and companionship over all the years.

The music plays to the images of the memories—and in their grief, they all remember, and in the remembering they give thanks.

We travel to the graveside and they take their seats, right there in the front.

There is the holding of hands in unity. And there is scripture and prayer—a time of family and togetherness within this moment of saying goodbye.

And then, they greet family and friends … and they smile: the husband and daughter, the sister and granddaughter. They smile and thank them each for coming—thank them for being here to remember … for being here to give thanks too.

They gather flowers and place them on top.

And they watch as it’s slowly lowered down.

And while the grief is raw and real in this moment of the now, it is the beauty of her memory that will live on in each of them. The beauty of her essence that will remain. This beauty that allows them to give thanks in their grief.

Today I have witnessed gratitude in grief. And it is powerful and moving.

Gratitude changes everything.

Because it’s in the gratitude of remembering,

that even on this most difficult day,

there is joy.

In your most difficult days, may you give thanks, and experience His joy, is my prayer.

Have you ever given thanks in grief?

How did it bring you joy?

Continuing on, in the counting of One Thousand Gifts {#1301-1310} with Ann and this community, and the Joy Dare of 2012 with March’s  printable…

#1301 Singing Matthew 6:33 all together–memory verse and music class all in one

#1302 An opportunity to share with all the good morning girls, for those moments when we just need to start over

#1303 Talks with my husband, music for worship, and audio books on my late night drive

#1304 Conversations with friends from long ago, and many memories revisited: homemade applesauce, piano lessons, 3rd grade math club … all so special to me

#1305 The honor of listening to her story … the one of her mom dying almost one year ago

#1306 The children running and playing and picking flowers

#1307 Meaningful talks with mom on our drive home

#1308 The intentional learning and relationship we build in homeschooling each and every day

#1309 New plants planted in the yard, and fresh paint on the banisters

#1310 The reminder of His suffering and the sharing in it during this Lenten season

Related posts:

What I Learned {September 2013} Undone For When We Need to Slow Down Time to See the Beauty