{Click here to read Part 1}
God uses even the most broken vessels to shine His light through their cracks, reflecting His love to the world.
As I returned to my cabin, my steps felt lighter. And it’s amazing how three hours alone with God can begin to set a heart free!
I met up with the ladies, and as we made our way to dinner, I had no idea what was in store.
We passed around the salad and the bread, and as the main dish arrived I couldn’t believe how the conversation spontaneously turned toward marriage again.
And then, it happened.
One of the ten women flung open the transparency door, in which I’d left a crack, the night before. And without hesitation she blurted,
“Jacque … why did you get divorced?”
And while the timing of the question was a surprise, for me, the answer was not difficult. I had answered that question so many times, always giving the “pat answer” to avoid all the details.
“We married young … came to an impasse … and over time…”
But as I gave the generic reply I felt the nudge inside my heart, “Tell your story”.
But I argued … and my internal rationalizations ravaged on.
Not tonight. We JUST agreed on that for the first time this afternoon. I’m not ready. It’s not organized. I don’t know what to include. I just can’t, not tonight…When dinner ended, no sooner had I walked out of the dining hall, she ran after me,
“Can we talk?”
“Of course,” I said,
And I felt the nudge again, “Tell your story” … and still I argued, hesitated, hemmed and hawed.
She continued to talk over my conflicted internal dialogue, sharing her story, which was surprisingly similar to mine.
For whatever reason, she was confiding in me, trusting me, and asking for my advice … begging for help with her situation.
“God appoints people who do disappoint – to point to a God who never disappoints.”
~Ann Voskamp
Reluctantly, I agreed to meet her back at her cabin, so we could privately talk.
I changed into my cozy clothes and walked over. But when she opened the door, I was surprised to find all her roommates there too–even Vicky, who didn’t even know Jesus.
Was I really supposed to share with them all? Fear set in and doubt began to choke me. But the impression was clear. I knew it was Him, and I was determined to obey.
And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28 (NASB)
I shared my story that night, raw and unedited, spontaneous and unrehearsed. It was a very late night–one I hoped I wouldn’t regret.
The retreat concluded the next morning with a salvation message and communion. It had been a life-changing weekend for me–opening the door to transparency, listening to God’s voice, and obeying. God is so good and gratitude filled my heart for how He met me in that meadow—how I was going home changed.
As we were gathering our things, and preparing to drive down the mountain, Vicky approached me and asked if we could talk.
My stomach began to do flips.
Had my story disappointed her?
Had my failure killed her hope?
We walked a bit down the path and then she just said it, plain as day,
“I accepted Jesus this morning…”
I stopped dead in my tracks.
“Really? Vicky. That’s wonderful!”
And after a long congratulatory hug, she profusely thanked me for sharing my story, because for her, it had changed everything.
And what if our stories, our very lives, are made for just that … to change everything? ← Tweet That
For so long she’d been torn about choosing Jesus, thinking she needed to have everything “sorted out” and her life “cleaned up” and “together” first. She’d been waiting for the right time—waiting so long.
But because of my story,
Because of my failure,
Because of God’s ability to make even me new,
She now realized she didn’t have to “have it all together” or “be perfect with everything in order” before she could accept Christ.
Because of what God had done for me, she knew He could do it for her too … even now.
I froze right there, speechless and in awe—our God weaving and working in ways that could only be Him.
I hugged her goodbye, so humbled.
It had been all Him … ALL Him, through broken me—broken and shattered by my own choices, now being mended and remade by His. ← Tweet that
Not just to be forgiven, but to be used as a vessel for Kingdom work of eternal value.
I was changed.
Forgiving myself was the hardest of all, not because God’s mercy was not immediate, or His grace lacked abundance, I was simply a poor recipient of His grace.
To not forgive my own heart when He already had, degraded what He had done for me. And that realization changed everything.
By this we shall know that we are of the truth and reassure our heart before him; for whenever our heart condemns us, God is greater than our heart, and he knows everything. 1 John 3:19-20 (ESV)
He knows everything. He has forgiven us. And God is greater than our heart.
So friend, today, won’t you let it go?
Set your heart free?
He longs to make all things new.
Because even when we make a mess of our lives…There is nothing too messy for Him.
Nothing too undone for Him to restore.
Nothing too broken for Him to repair,
And nothing so wasted He will not redeem.
NOTHING.
When mercy found me, yes, I was changed. But the fullness of the work God wants to do in our hearts is really a daily life-long process, allowing ourselves to be found by His mercy over and over again.
Mercy Found Me…
And I’m longing for it to find you too…
In whatever brokenness you endure,
Whatever mud through which you wade,
As you look to Him and surrender,
I promise.
Just watch and see, it will not be … unredeemed.
How did mercy find you?
What are you longing for God to redeem?
How can I pray for you?
To read ALL posts in this series, When Mercy Found Me ←click here
Unredeemed
Written by: Chad Cates, Brian David Petak, Tony Wood Recorded by: SelahThe lonely ache, The burning tears
The bitter nights, The wasted years Life breaks and falls apart
But we know these are… Places, where grace is, Soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled,
It may be unrestored,
But when anything that’s shattered, is laid before the Lord,
Just watch and see,
It will not be… Unredeemed For every choice, that led to shame
And all the love, that never came
For every vow, that someone broke
And every lie, that gave up hope
We live in the shadow of the fall,
But the cross says these are all… Places, where grace is, Soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled,
It may be unrestored,
But when anything that’s shattered, is laid before the Lord
Just watch and see,
It will not be… Unredeemed Oh He will wipe every tear… Will not be … be unredeemed Places, where grace is, Soon to be so amazing
It may be unfulfilled,
It may be unrestored,
But you never know the miracle, the Father has in store,
Just watch and see, It will not be… Just watch and see,
It will not be… Unredeemed
Photo Credit: Yug_and_her, Flickr Creative Commons
Oh, my friend…what beauty you have shared with all of us. Redemptive beauty. Thank you for sharing your story. I still marvel at your bravery, but I realize it is obedience and there is always joy and blessing in obeying His will. Thank you, Jacque…I love you.
I am just left in awe, praising God for moving and restoring and saving in ways that only He can…Bless you my friend! Mercy has indeed found you!!!
Jacque, reading your story has left me so blessed! Thank you for sharing it and continually being someone whom God uses to touch my heart and draw closer to His. Love yoU my friend!
Yes, joy, my friend…much love to you!
Yes indeed…praising with you, and praying many others are found by mercy too!
Oh Sarah, thank you for seeing Him, for looking to Him…it has been and will always be only because of Him! XOXO sweet friend 🙂
What is more beautiful than His grace? Nothing… I know! What an emotional journey through your story. Every time I consider the power of His love I weep…Bless you sister, for surrendering and trusting…to the praise of His glorious grace!
Oh Kathy, thank you for coming by, for reading, and blessing me with your words. And yes, may it ALL be to the praise of His glorious grace! Blessings to you 🙂
Your words have pierced my heart. I’ve been in the pit and the journey out has been a long one. Our stories are different, but the journey to find redemption almost the same. I’ve struggled to find words to tell my story but your words so eloquently tell what His story is for us, where grace and mercy heal. And the freedom God so desires for each of us to rest in his arms, forgiven. Thank you for sharing your story.
Jacque, thank you so much. So much.
When I was in Bible college, I invited a friend to a small group because I wanted him to know Jesus. He was the only one there that was not a Bible student. He never did (as far as I know) come to Jesus because he never felt that he could measure up. I have been heart broken over that, even more now that I am more mature and see what our naivete did to him.
You are a beautiful woman, Jacque.
I stayed up way too late last night reading your story, and finished it early this morning before my kids woke up. A fascinating story of mercy, captivatingly told. And for me, these words about the power of story were a treasured gift, just what I needed to hear today…”And what if our stories, our very lives, are made for just that … to change everything?”
I wondered why I had not had the delight of finding your blog and hearing your testimony sooner, but that was because God knew that I needed your words today, right where I’m at. Thanks, Jacque, for all the times you have said ‘yes’ to God in the meadow that day, leading to a moment when He used you to whisper to me.
Oh Trina, thank you. Thank you for reading and writing these words to me, because the baring of my past and my heart is for THE purpose of another not feeling alone, not wondering if they’re beyond God’s grace, and knowing that there is NOTHING God won’t redeem…nothing! I’m living proof of that! xoxo
Yes, Lisa, where grace and mercy heal. Resting. And completely and forever forgiven. Praying you’ll find your words…and thank you for your encouragement to me. It means so very much!
Thank you so much Tereasa! You bless me…
God bless you. Thank you for sharing. God is healing me one day at a time. Your story is a comfort and a hope for me.
Thank you so much…the fact that God uses even me, to bring comfort and hope to someone else, is such an unexpected gift, one that at one time I thought would never be possible. May God continue mending your broken pieces, one shard at a time, to complete healing. He is faithful. This I know. xoxo
Oh sweet Jacque, I am just so in awe of our great God. Stories like yours, stories like mine, stories that display the mind-bendingly beautiful redemption of God leave me with no other choice but worship.
Our purpose, the very reason we exist, is to know and display God’s character. And while I don’t know everyone on earth, you might be the best display of HIS redemption I know. Thank you for showing off who God is. xoxo
Oh Angie, thank you for seeing Him…for choosing to worship. May His GREAT name be praised for this unending grace and bottomless mercy He gives. It is all Him and I’m so very thankful! xo
I read your story this morning, and it was a gift that will be resonating with me for a while. So I thank you for this gift that is from the Lord, through you. Thank you.
Beautiful, inspiring story. God is doing amazing things through you. Thank you for showing your mess…and the things that God has done through it.
I have just sat here and read through your entire story. First, how remarkably brave of you to bring it to the fore and share it so unreservedly. I am humbled by your story and it has touched my heart.
I still struggle with the pain I left behind when I had the affair 13 years ago, and reading how you asked the people hurt by your actions for forgiveness has inspired me to consider doing something similar. I always thought that was a bit nuts, this not quite getting over things, even though it’s 13 years down the line and we’ve all moved on.
You’ve written so eloquently right into your soul and I can completely relate to what you have written. By now, I am sure you know that I am not a Christian. However, your story has taught me great lessons and I am grateful you shared it.
I bumped into my ex-sister-in-law and the look of horror on her face when she saw it was me shamed me all over again and I felt I could never escape what I had done. I am glad I don’t need to stay locked into the prison any longer.
Thank you.
Oh Amy…so thankful for your kindness and for seeing His gifts even through me..
He’s had such a mess to remake in me, but He is…He really is, and if in me in others too, and I am so very thankful! Blessings to you Aprille 🙂
Tam, I am so blessed you have come and have read my story. That it gives you hope, is the very reason I dared write it in the first place. Because I remember the feelings of despair, and the desperation of my heart. The guilt and shame wrapping me up in knots. And it has been my greatest passion to reach those who are hurting too with the message that there IS hope, that mercy can find them too, that NOTHING is beyond God’s ability to redeem and transform! I am praying freedom and healing for you as you’ve never known it before…xo
Thank you, that’s very kind. I will be writing my ex-husband a letter, even though this is now nearly 14 years later. And I will be performing zange, a Buddhist apology.
Thank you again for sharing your story.
Hi I’m so very touched by your story. Somehow I stumbled upon your blog when I was in church yesterday. I should have been listening to the pastor but my mind was somewhere else. Thinking about my marriage issues and about divorce. After reading your story I cried . I am in awe of how real God is and how he has redeemed you in the darkest moments of your life. You are very brave to share your story and I want you to know that I am very grateful.
I believe now that God will give me the strength to go on. Thank you so much. God bless your kind and generous spirit .
Oh Marilyn…your words touch me deeply as my prayer has been that God would use my life to point others to Him, even in their most broken moments. Thank you for seeing Him and His mercy through my story. Please never forget He IS with you, He will never leave you, and NOTHING can separate you from His love. EVER. Blessings to you! xo
Wow. I came across your blog yesterday. Today, during my lunch hour I read all of your posts. I must say I hesitated to read it at first. Yesterday, when I read that you had been divorced because of your affair and then married the man with which you had an affair I thought there was no way it was something I needed to read. So, I didn’t bookmark it. But, I did bookmark another blog and through that blog was led to look for your blog again today. I was still hesitant when I first started to read it. But, I knew I was supposed to.
I will be honest and say that when I first started reading and even over half-way through reading I was praying I had read something wrong yesterday and you ended back up with your first husband, somehow, someway. You see, I am the one who was cheated on in marriage. I have been led by God to stand and wait for my husband. There is no doubt in my mind that is what I am called to do. I am one who if my husband called me today and said “I want to come home” I would welcome him with open arms. We have been separated for two years now. And, over those two years I’ve learned it was never about my marriage to begin with. It’s about me getting to know God in a way I’ve never known Him before. It’s about my spouse coming to that same understanding of Who God really is and how very much He loves him, no matter what. But, my marriage, its downfall and eventual rebuilding, is the vehicle God is using to make this possible.
I want to thank you for sharing your story. It humbled me in a way that I needed to be humbled. It reminded me that things are not always black and white. It reminded me that God never wastes pain and He always shows up with His redemptive power when you cry out to Him and wait for Him to answer. It reminded me that there is nothing that He cannot restore, whether it is my marriage or your situation. It reminded me that everybody’s story is different but they are all for the same purpose, to honor and glorify Him.
Penny…I am humbled and full of gratitude for your willingness to not only read my story, but to write to me here. I hesitated for over a decade to share my story at all, in person and online, since I suspected there would be no benefit in sharing. I was that woman who not only committed adultery, but also failed again by marrying that person. The shame and guilt was smothering, and I wondered if God even still could love me and forgive me, let alone use any of it for good. But through profound failure I have come to learn of His great love that never ends, His mercy that finds us again and again…how sin is sin to Him, and while He allows consequences to our choices in this life, He never withdraws His love, and never gives up covering us with His grace and mercy…nothing we can earn, but a gift from Him because of His great love. My heart hurts with you in your situation, and yet what a gift that you’ve surrendered to this as being the vehicle God is using to make you more like Him. Thank you for your words to me…words like yours continue to help me heal, and give me the courage to continue to share the news of how mercy found me and how, if it can find even me, it can find anyone! Many prayers and blessings to you…xo
Jacque,
I just sat down and read your story from start to finish. I’ve never read it all together before, and missed some important pieces of beauty. Seeing you now–how you radiate God’s glory–reading this difficult journey brought tears. Oh, God’s grace is breathtaking. The way He loves us so humbling. I’m grateful for you–for the way you share to help others. You are a shining star 🙂
Oh Laura…I’m humbled and so very grateful for your words…for you taking the time to read and write such beautiful words to me. Thank you for seeing His breathtaking grace in my story…the way He loves us so. This has been my prayer, that through my brokenness others would see Him. What a gift to have spent time with you at Allume. Your friendship is a treasure to me! xo
Hello, Jacque! Your story is so touching and will surely help a lot of people who are going through so much pain. Thank you for writing it, for sharing it and for being so helpful. God bless you!
Jacque, I just read your whole story. WOW. What an amazing testimony of God’s…well…His everything! His love, his relentless pursuit, his grace and mercy and forgiveness and ALL OF IT. Thank you for being so brave to share it with us! Your message of NOTHING being too broken for God to redeem it – it’s something I need to hear right now. Thank you.
This is probably the most amazing story of redemption that I have heard in my life. I grew up the “good girl” I walked the line perfectly for all to see. Those stories of druggies and prostitutes being saved have never been able to relate to me the way yours has. This year we, my husband and I, have watched friends and family go through separations and divorce with fear and if we’re honest self-righteousness. Fear that it could be us next. Self-righteousness that we would NEVER do something like that. We’ve been angry and heart broken by turn. I think the hardest has been my sister-in-law. She was married to a sweet albeit emotionally lazy man. She went looking. Those were her words. She sat in my living room, pregnant with another man’s child and told me “I went looking.” I have felt a lot of anger with her and truthfully disgust. Yet, through your story, I feel a renewed sense of compassion and an urgency to continue to praying her through this. I don’t know what God has in store for her but, Thank you for sharing. I will be sharing with my husband as well. Perhaps one day I’ll even be able to share with her if she wishes.
Thank you so much, Conny..
Hi Mary, yes. His relentless pursuit, His grace and mercy and forgiveness..ALL. OF. IT. May your heart know it well, close, and unrelenting, this great love of our God, and the redeeming plans He has in store. Because if God can redeem my life, He can do anything. Sending much, much love to you, until I get to meet you in person one day…xoxo
Kimberly, what grace for you to write this to me. No. words. I’m so sorry for what has happened, and I’m giving thanks that even my story could help…to renew compassion and an urgency to pray. I am humbled how God uses any.thing. for His good, as we surrender to Him. And I will pray for her, as her heart goes through, what I know is a long road, but one never impossible to be redeemed. And I hear your heart championing that. Thank you so very much for your words to me. You bless.
Just finished reading your story. I saw you at the Shine event on Jan 11 in Corona and was moved bby your transparency with pain send regret. Having read your story now, I see that it was not easy for that to happen, but thank the Lord it did!!
Thank you April for reading and for seeing the goodness and mercy of our God in my story. Giving thanks with you to our gracious God who does redeem and restore as only He can. Blessings to you!
Hi Jacque,
I found your blog today through a friend. Some of your story is far too close to home for me…but thank you for sharing it. I think I needed it. I don’t really know what to do with all of it yet – but that’s kind of how God works in my life. He constantly brings me to an end of myself, and challenges my sinful attitudes, and makes me work through my pain. Life is not clear cut!
His grace and His mercy are truly astonishing…as is the way He is using you in the lives of others. I love the fact that He is using your past to minister to others. I love that because of Jesus we get to walk in freedom and grace, no matter what our past is 🙂
God bless you, your husband and your kids.
Freedom and grace, no matter our past…yes! And may we never forget!
Wow. I’m speechless and in tears after reading your story. I found the link to your page on the unveiled wives site and I can’t remember the last time I was so moved by something. I know you wrote it a few years ago but it’s new to me and touching my heart on so many levels and my eyes filled with tears after every page as I stopped to reflect back on my own story. I can relate in so many ways to your story. I’m in my second marriage as well and constantly worried that my husband will be unfaithful although he hasn’t really given me a reason to be insecure. I suspect that it’s partly because I was unfaithful in my first marriage because I started feeling ignored and neglected by my husband who stopped giving me the affection and attention I need to be happy in a relationship. My first husband never found out about my affair with my high school sweetheart which only lasted about 2 months before the guilt caused me to end it. And even though I chose to end both the affair, (because God insisted!) and my marriage shortly afterwards, I never regretted the divorce because God had been trying to warn me not to marry him in the first place. That it wasn’t in His Will and would not last.
But that doesn’t make what I did right and I think now that I’m with the man I actually had God’s approval to marry, and love with all my heart I fear he will cheat on me because maybe I deserve it for what I did in my first marriage even though God keeps showing me Isaiah 40:1 & 2 and reassuring me that I am forgiven and I can relax. Still, I constantly fear my husband will be unfaithful and I won’t be able to handle it. Your words about being forgiven, forgiving ourselves, and trusting God really make a difference and just like your heart was finally set free from guilt, I know mine will be set free from this worry and obsession if I continue to work as hard as I can to trust God and renew my mind and thinking. Thank you so much for sharing your story and please pray for my heart to be set free as well.
On Angela…I AM praying for you…that your heart would really grasp and know the deep DEEP love God has for you and the forgiveness that is already yours in Him. Thank you for seeing Him even in my story. He is so SO good. xo
“To be known and then rejected was too painful.
But hiding had pain of its own.”
This is me. I am here and it hurts. My husband and I are fighting for our marriage after full disclosure of what I have done, but now I feel trapped in this cage of silence as to not embarass my husband. I want to share my story. I want to reach out to those who can offer advice or who need to here that after all the pain I had caused, I truly know God still loves me and His blood is still powerful enough to cover my sin.
Thank you for your honesty and boldness in sharing your story. I know God can use my story one day as well for His glory.
Thanks for sharing. It is a really needed encouragement. May I ask your opinion? Does forgiving ourselves and also others mean also tolerating the “hurtfull” attitude? Does humbling ourselves and the humiliation also mean that we have to accept not only the same pain but also the same acts toward us? I am lost and tired. And cannot reason anymore whether the forgiveness also means that we have to receive whatever other people do towards us. I do not know if I can bear the pain anymore. God bless you for sharing this, Jacque.
I cannot tell you how God spoke to me through your story. God is truly blessing you, and your story has given me hope that regardless of what happens to my marriage that He still has a purpose and a plan and will take care of me. I feel like your background and mine are similar (Christian homes, striving to please others, etc). A year and a half ago, I cheated on my husband. While it was a short lived affair (due to him finding out), I completely came clean three months after him finding out (I initially lied to him about the details at first because I was scared of losing him). He seemed to forgive me, but just last month something triggered and He has had a change of heart towards me. He is talking about moving out this weekend. While this has left me lost and alone, I have discovered and drawn closer to God than I have ever felt. Your story has made me realize that regardless of what happens between my husband and myself that 1) He is ultimately in control- even if that means my marriage will not be reconciled (praying it will be though) 2) He will take care of me and 3) He can still use me for His honor and glory. He has led me to a wonderful Bible based counseling center, and I’m hoping that I can continue to draw closer to him during this time of trial and struggle in my marriage. I ask that you pray for me as well as my husband as he is dealing with hurt and pain and refuses counseling. Thank you for your story as well as the song you have at the end of your story “Unredeemed”. God spoke to me through that song. Thank you for being God’s vessel!!!
WOW.
So… I’m not married, I’m fully single, I’ve not “cheated” on anyone., I’ve never even been in a relationship but this testimony..reading the whole thing has really really shaken and touched me to the core of my being. At first, it was the part about being miss little perfect that resonated with me. Then it was the part about being burnt out trying so hard to please people because of a deep sense of unworthiness. Then it was the bit about knowing about God but not knowing Him. Then it was the bit of being self righteous in my good deeds….but reading it in its entirety, God really really revealed to me about FORGIVENESS. Quietly, but a big slap in the face.
A long story short, I got myself entangled and gave my heart away to a guy who basically used me for his own validation. (And we weren’t even in a relationship). And these last four years have been mental anguish..God used this guy to shake me out of my self righteousness, my self justification, to question my faith and walk with Him, to question the intellectual rigors of Christianity, to humble me, to forgive and all that and more. I thought I had forgiven, I thought I had been changed and challenged, I thought, thought, thought…but for all the sermons I’ve been listening, it was your story today (even as he and I spoke yesterday about how our attempts to be friends have failed) YOUR STORY SO FAR ACROSS THE WORLD, and not the intellectual sermons that have revealed to me – I have not fully, unconditionally forgiven. My forgiveness, even with purest intentions, have not been 100% unconditional. I am still wanting to be friends to “save” him. I still hadn’t fully let go. I still get jealous seeing him date other girls. I still want to show him the error of his ways. even my attempts to witness a godly life have been based on…my Saviour mentality and performance, not actually wanting to seek God first. I still hold on because I’m afraid of letting go. My heart has still not been totally uprooted and more. Even as God has shown me I need to let go. R.E.P.E.A.T.E.D.L.Y.
I probably sound bit airy fairy and incoherent, but this simple, yet so startling revelation has lifted a burden from my shoulders. I went for a run to meditate and contemplate on this, and I was so joyful…to see how self righteous and blind and unforgiving and all that I still am. I thought I had changed, but it humbled me to see how much more God has to change me. It’s not even about him anymore…but about me. And how much more moulding I need. I know more hardship is to come, I cannot say I will always rejoice, but as I learn to be content, this message today is sufficient for me to contemplate, meditate and rejoice in. I had to even laugh at my own stupidity and blindness as I was running…the verse “I will rejoice in my iniquities” have never meant so real to me. I sat for the the longest time just rejoicing and meditating on this revelation, just saying thank you again and again. I can’t believe how much self righteousness I possess that it has permeated to so many areas of my life. (And there is probably more! But God is being kind to reveal to me step by step ;0)
So…long post after…Thank you. Beauty for ashes indeed.
Thank you Jacque for baring your soul with such redemptive beauty, grace and such Mercy! You definitely have a gift of writing and your courage to share all the truths so honest and vulnerably leave me touched and in such awe.
I realize I am reading this and commenting long after the others. I read all afternoon from beginning to end, wanting to comment on each one along the way, but didn’t and then almost left without leaving any. I came across your blog from your “Mud Stories” at iTunes because I was drawn to search you out and now I know why. I will refrain from telling my story, but just want you to know I definitely can relate, see similarities and understand why God sent me here to read even after many years since my own sinful affairs and all the consequences I am still paying for … as well as my spouse (since we’ve lived separate lives now for over 20 yrs. but not divorced). Fortunately, I know that Jesus paid for all of my sin(s) and my wrong choices/ decisions will one day find me this kind of an ending of mercy, being completely redeemed and healed. I pray that is true for my spouse also, as he finally comes to accept Jesus as his Lord and Savior, repents of his wrongs (like porn) and receives the Grace and Mercy that you write about and I too have been so richly given. Our circumstances (yours and mine) are much different but the lessons learned are not. I’m still a work in progress yet I still related on so much. My spouse says that he’s forgiven me but that’s not what I see or feel. My last adultery ended after 13 yrs. with the other one taking his life. My husband knew about this one before it happened and through it all. Perhaps if I had surrendered and learned like you, I would never had another broken relationship. Even if my marriage was never God’s choice for me, I should never have been such a prodigal spouse. I probably don’t make much sense but that’s what happens when you try to condense 40 yrs. briefly. However …
I am so thankful that we are redeemed and the places God’s grace and mercy reach!!! Praise God!
This quote (although there are so many that struck a deep chord) is the most profound for me: “To be known and then rejected was too painful. But hiding had pain of its own.” You have written beautifully of all the “mud” and brokenness, I am glad that God led me to your redemptive story but even more, I’m so blessed to see how “mercy found” you and indeed it makes it all worth it. You have shared powerfully and yet with some humbleness how God changes everything that we place in His hands. Thank you so much for the way you share your story to help others and for God’s glory. ~Peggy
Jacque, I just found and read your story. It touched me in ways I cannot say. I am so encouraged that you were able to find the grace and forgiveness of the Father. Your story has revealed to me how much grace and mercy He really does have and for all types of sin. I want to find the Father like that. Please pray for me because I am very bound up with guilt for being fearful and depressed in life. Thanks again.